Spring is teasing us a little today in St. John's. The sun is trying to break through the clouds and peek above the fog. The wind is taking a breather and the 9 degree temperature actually feels like.... 9 degrees. That's a novelty in these parts because wind chill is a factor here even in July. Well, at least in the west end of the capital city the weather is pretty nice.
I'm writing today's story while enjoying a paper cup of tea at my office, which just happens to be in the Starbucks outlet that is in the west end. Starbucks has likely figured out that nicer weather equates to more customers, which equates to more profits. They have three coffee shops in St. John's and neither of them is in the east end. There are rumours of a location being planned for the burgeoning east end power center in RDF county. (RDF is rain, drizzle, fog) Wouldn't that make a fantastic name for some type of skinny, nonfat, decaf, vanilla latte with an espresso shot and made from soy milk? One Venti sized RDF please and will you take my car as collateral for the down payment on that? If you want cheap, go to Tim's. Come to Starbucks for an experience, for inspiration, and free internet.
One of the Starbucks is downtown, but I question whether that area is even a part of the real St. John's. Downtown can't make up its mind if it wants to be in the east end or the west end. It tries to be a double agent by referring to its two major street as Water Street East or Water Street West and Duckworth Street East and Duckworth Street West. The problem is further complicated by the fact that city hall sits right in the middle of downtown. Politicians, being politicians, sit on the fence and won't dare declare downtown as being officially the west end or the east end of town. It's a good thing that no one lives there. Downtown is businesses, bars, bums, and taxi cabs. That is where the city's nickname of 'Sin City" was derived and earned. As an east ender, I'm more than happy to give downtown to the west end.
The west end seems to hog more than its fair share of the better weather too. Some cities choose to divide themselves by way or north versus south, uptown versus downtown, and upper versus lower. St. John's, in keeping with its disdain for compasses, mapmakers and GPS, uses the simplest description to describe "where you are at". You are either in the west end or the east end. There is no where else.
I feel for visitors to our warm city (warm, as in welcoming, not as in almost hot). Should they ever get lost and ask a local for directions to Starbucks, it is bound to sound something like this - "You knows where yer at now, right? Ok....well, go back to where ya came from, when you comes to the light, stop if its red. You'll see a red house on the left with a van in the driveway that's up on blocks. That's Billy Mercer's old van that he used when he was taxiing. Anyways, when you sees Billy's van, take the second left then the first right. The road turns to the left but ya still ha to take the first right. Sometimes people gets confused about dat. Follow that road until you comes to Betty's Convenience store. It'd be best to stop into Betty's to get them to tell you how to get to Kenmount Road from there. If Betty's not around, her husband Kev is probably in the back stacking bottles or rearranging the salt meat buckets. He's pretty good at giving directions too. When your there, tell them that Ricky'll be over in a little while. They'll know who you means. Take care now, gotta run. Have a great time on the Rock. We loves helping you mainlanders out."
If you visitors think that you will outsmart a local by resorting to your cell phone to seek directions, then you may want to think again. We have that one covered too. The standard and ingrained reply from a townie to anyone seeking directions by phone is "Stay where you'r at, whilst I comes where you'r to." The good news is that St. John's is not that big so you can pretty much tour the whole place in a day. We also have no really dangerous places that you have to avoid for fear of your life. The Brow, The Circle, The Blocks, The Pond, and The Square are merely urban areas of rugged beauty. They are full of character and characters. You'll find these communities in both the east end and the west end of the city. Be sure to have your camera ready when you come to these wonderful neighbourhoods. Just don't stop to ask for directions.
I'm writing today's story while enjoying a paper cup of tea at my office, which just happens to be in the Starbucks outlet that is in the west end. Starbucks has likely figured out that nicer weather equates to more customers, which equates to more profits. They have three coffee shops in St. John's and neither of them is in the east end. There are rumours of a location being planned for the burgeoning east end power center in RDF county. (RDF is rain, drizzle, fog) Wouldn't that make a fantastic name for some type of skinny, nonfat, decaf, vanilla latte with an espresso shot and made from soy milk? One Venti sized RDF please and will you take my car as collateral for the down payment on that? If you want cheap, go to Tim's. Come to Starbucks for an experience, for inspiration, and free internet.
One of the Starbucks is downtown, but I question whether that area is even a part of the real St. John's. Downtown can't make up its mind if it wants to be in the east end or the west end. It tries to be a double agent by referring to its two major street as Water Street East or Water Street West and Duckworth Street East and Duckworth Street West. The problem is further complicated by the fact that city hall sits right in the middle of downtown. Politicians, being politicians, sit on the fence and won't dare declare downtown as being officially the west end or the east end of town. It's a good thing that no one lives there. Downtown is businesses, bars, bums, and taxi cabs. That is where the city's nickname of 'Sin City" was derived and earned. As an east ender, I'm more than happy to give downtown to the west end.
The west end seems to hog more than its fair share of the better weather too. Some cities choose to divide themselves by way or north versus south, uptown versus downtown, and upper versus lower. St. John's, in keeping with its disdain for compasses, mapmakers and GPS, uses the simplest description to describe "where you are at". You are either in the west end or the east end. There is no where else.
I feel for visitors to our warm city (warm, as in welcoming, not as in almost hot). Should they ever get lost and ask a local for directions to Starbucks, it is bound to sound something like this - "You knows where yer at now, right? Ok....well, go back to where ya came from, when you comes to the light, stop if its red. You'll see a red house on the left with a van in the driveway that's up on blocks. That's Billy Mercer's old van that he used when he was taxiing. Anyways, when you sees Billy's van, take the second left then the first right. The road turns to the left but ya still ha to take the first right. Sometimes people gets confused about dat. Follow that road until you comes to Betty's Convenience store. It'd be best to stop into Betty's to get them to tell you how to get to Kenmount Road from there. If Betty's not around, her husband Kev is probably in the back stacking bottles or rearranging the salt meat buckets. He's pretty good at giving directions too. When your there, tell them that Ricky'll be over in a little while. They'll know who you means. Take care now, gotta run. Have a great time on the Rock. We loves helping you mainlanders out."
If you visitors think that you will outsmart a local by resorting to your cell phone to seek directions, then you may want to think again. We have that one covered too. The standard and ingrained reply from a townie to anyone seeking directions by phone is "Stay where you'r at, whilst I comes where you'r to." The good news is that St. John's is not that big so you can pretty much tour the whole place in a day. We also have no really dangerous places that you have to avoid for fear of your life. The Brow, The Circle, The Blocks, The Pond, and The Square are merely urban areas of rugged beauty. They are full of character and characters. You'll find these communities in both the east end and the west end of the city. Be sure to have your camera ready when you come to these wonderful neighbourhoods. Just don't stop to ask for directions.
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