Yeah, I know. You're wondering where the heck I've been? Well.... life happens. Maybe you thought I ran out of ideas? Never going to happen. My brain ain't the biggest, nor does it fire neutrons and electrons around as readily as missiles are currently flying around the Middle East, but it often sees rainbows in a world that, these days, seems mostly grey and dreary.
Perhaps you figured that I have made enough money from my writing and that I am resting on my laurels along with my royalties. Nope....haven't made even one red cent (whatever that is) from putting pen to paper or from clickety-clacking on a keyboard . So, you're thinking it must be that Jim just got sick and tired of writing. Wrong again. I love this stuff. What else gets me up at 4:15 A.M.?
Well, to be perfectly honest, there is something, or more precisely, someone for whom the time of day matters not to me. That would be my competitive swimming 15 year old daughter, who practices, well before dawn, five mornings a week. At that hour is it really morning or is it more appropo to say she practices late at night? In any event, one more year and she will be old enough to drive herself and I can stay in bed. It's a good thing we have two vehicles because when that time comes I bet you a million bucks that her mom, also know as my wife, will be conducting mobile surveillance to make sure her first born arrives at the pool safe and sound.
Early risings are no chore for me. I love both my kids indescribably, so being in their company is priceless daddy-daughter time. Time spent writing is right up there too. Those minutes and hours I spend crafting a story in my mind, chewing on the ideas and spitting out those that are crappy is time well spent. A writer's busy mind is the antithesis of idol hands being the devil's workshop.
When I started typing at 4:15 this morning, I had an idea that I thought may be a fun to pursue. As often is the case, everything that I have typed so far bears absolutely no similarity to that original idea. Once I begin to type, my rainbow loving brain takes over and I am powerless to stop it.
For your reading pleasure and as an example of what goes through the mind of someone who awakes shortly after 4:00 A.M. (not much or, at least, not much that is earth shattering), I'll relate my original idea. I probably should have ended today's blog two sentences ago but what the heck. I've been away from writing for 51 weeks so I am prepared to cut myself some slack if the following story doesn't measure up. I'll make a deal with you, if you don't enjoy it then only send me half of the money that you usually send. ;-) Here is today's story as a work in progress.
possible titles...........The Letter Between B and D or Now You C It Now You Don't (needs work!!)
Given that it was January, 2015 when I last posted, I thought it only prudent that I begin by saying hello to everyone. From there I ran with the idea that I would say hello using as many words or expressions as I could think of that began with the letter H. I came of with five. Accompanying Hello, the other four where: Howdy; Hey!; Hi; and How ya doing? My idea was to then gracefully, yet amazingly, move you, the reader, from H to the letter C. Riveting writing for sure! You get what you pay for. :-\
I make the smooth transition to C. Here it comes.....
For 2016 I am anti just about any word that begins with C. C has had its day. I am done with it. I think you'd agree. During the previous few years, the "Big C", the dreaded cancer, has been prominent in my family. My loved ones are all doing well but we will forever be ardent enemies of the "Big C".
To strengthening my argument for the abolition of C, last spring I was found to have a coronary condition. (good use of alliteration and they are C words too..bonus!) When I was told I had developed arrhythmia my first thought was that it meant my tone deafness had been cured and I would finally be able carry a tune. Taking a page from Adele, I'd be calling my debut album 50. Google dictionary crushed that dream. Arrhythmia has something to do with electrical misfiring of the heart so that it speeds up for no apparent reason. My heart rate would double in the blink of an eye. What a rush! No need for caffeine, chocolate, cookies or crack cocaine? These pesky C words could be removed from my vocabulary. (An admission - I have never tried crack cocaine, although I sure saw enough of it and what it does to people. It is caffeine multiplied by infinity. Not pretty! They both derive from the cocoa plant so go figure.)
Since my diagnosis, I've had one medical procedure, which I watched on a HDTV as the doctor probed around my heart with a pair of tweezers. It was as if he was playing a video game with my insides and I was hoping that he played a lot of Mario Brothers as a kid. He snipped a few of my internal wires and sent me on my way. He said I would be improved but that I would likely need a second procedure. He was right, my symptoms persist. Maybe this summer I'll get fixed so that my coronary becomes ordinary.
As we work towards and wait for good health to return to our clan, I am going to have to think of a few more C words to banish. Cod fishing......never; think of other C words for consideration
- cuddling??
- cognac - what kind of liquor is that anyway??
- cayaking - check spelling....
Finish with a profound yet witty statement that ties the entire story together and leaves the reader wanting more.
The End
That story never quite got finished. All in all, not a bad effort after being away from the writing game for almost a year. I promise my next story will have a beginning, middle, and end. My! Look at the time. It is almost 2:00 P.M. It's my bedtime. Surprised? A little early, you say! Well I do get up at 4:00 A.M. most mornings and I now do it without the benefit of caffeine, chocolate, and cookies. Thankfully I have my Adele albums and the arrhythmia to sing her songs. Goodbye, it's me, Jim.
